So, when I went to Scotland, I neglected to empty my compost and the container sat under my sink for two weeks in the nice warm air.  OMG

When I got home, fruit flies. And I don't mean just one or two. Swarms of fruit flies. You could barely breathe in through your nose without getting a couple up there in the old nasal passages.

Fruit flies are disgusting, if you ask me. Now, I know that scientists like to study them (although you'd think they'd go blind even watching the little suckers thru a microscope, they're so teeny) because they share a lot of genetic matches with us as far as diseases go. I don't care. I just want them gone.

I cleared out any food whatsoever and bleached practically every surface in my house. They are still here. Well, I'll tell you why. Those stupid female flies lay about 2000 eggs in their lifetime and their lifetime is like 10 or 12 days!! They apparently have one track minds - well maybe two because besides sex, they do eat a lot of rotting fruit. I blame the male fruit flies actually. They are all over ALL the females. No mating for life for these guys. Sound familiar? Anyhoo, don't get me started . . .

My latest strategy? Little bowls of balsamic vinegar with a drop of dish detergent, covered with plastic wrap with tiny holes punched in it. They can get in but can't seem to get out. They love the vinegar but the soap, I think, does them in. Plus they are trapped in their little plastic domes from hell. ha!  (Picture me rubbing my hands together with an evil laugh at their expense.)

So, this is me, ridding the world of fruit flies one at a time. I think maybe there might be fewer today.     Maybe...